30 Days of Truth – Day 29

Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.

I hope to change my motivation/attention issues. It’s a double whammy.

First, the motivational side of things. I am absolutely, totally terrible at motivating myself to get things done. It’s more obvious with the boring stuff that needs to be done, like housework, but also applies to things I actually want to do. I’m just one of those people who knows there’s stuff to be done but who sits on the couch and screws around on the internet instead. A prime example is writing. I want to write. I want to finish my book so I can publish it. But 9 times out of 10 when I sit at the computer I’ll find myself browsing comedy sites, checking out photos people have uploaded to FaceBook, or checking my email for the tenth time that day even though I never get anything interesting.

The “attention” issue applies to several things, but writing specifically. See, I have several different stories half-finished right now. Some are things I could eventually publish, some are just personal projects that couldn’t be published for legal reasons (fanfics, for example). Currently I’m focusing on the zombie story because that’s the one I want to finish and publish asap. My problem, which I’ve been dealing with for quite a while now, is a skittish attention span. I’ll do really well for a while. I’ll write, say, 20000 words or so. And then I’ll get bored. I’ll start thinking about one of the other stories and I’ll long to be writing that one instead. It’ll get to the point where I’m writing utter crap for the zombie story because I’m just not into it anymore. So I’ll move on to the other story instead. Rinse and repeat, except next time it’ll be one of the other stories that I start longing to work on. You would think that using this method I would eventually finish all of the stories. The problem is that by the time I cycle back around to the first one, I’ve pretty much forgotten what the hell I was doing. So I’ll have to read through everything I’ve already written, which inevitably results in deciding to change things or rewrite entire giant sections. In this way I rarely get any real decent amount of work done.

It’s this issues that I hope to change about myself. The “why” part of the question should be obvious, but for the sake of answering thoroughly, I want to change these things because otherwise I’ll never finish any of my stories, thus never publishing any of them, thus failing in my dream to eventually be a published author.

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